July 9th, 2008 @ 7:31 pm
Mariah: I cannot cut this! *waves fork at pizza rolls*
Me: *cuts them in half*
Mariah: *lets out a huge gasp* MOMMY! YOU ARE A GENIUS! OH, MOMMY!
There you have it, folks. According to my three year old, I’m a GENIUS. 
Sadly, that was the highlight of my day.
Want to know why? Because today I had the (QUICK, MEN. LOOK AWAY.) worst freaking cramps EVER. To the point where they were making me feel ill. And bitchy. And made my long to curl on my super soft couch with my heating pad. But I pulled through. Because I had a mission: I had to go grocery shopping. Our rations were getting to the point where I was opening my cabinets and sobbing, so off we went to Woodmans. I dropped about $120, but it was well worth it. Towards the end, I got lazy and started skipping aisles because I seriously felt like I was going to be sick. Visions of “Billy, clean up on aisle 6!” over the loud speaker kept flashing through my head, so I tried to hurry along the best I could. Finally, I was finished and my dad generously loaded the groceries and Gabriel and Mariah back into the car while I threw myself in the front seat and swallowed a Vicadin.
Once home, I quickly stashed the cold items and just as quickly forgot about the nonperishables. I placed Gabriel on a spread out blanket on the floor with about all his toys, changed him, put a movie in Mariah’s VCR and another in the living room DVD player, gave her a snack and collapsed on the couch with my heating pad and a book. Both kids behaved like angels while I willed my body to ease up and the Vicadin to SPEED up. Gabriel was content to sit on the floor in front of me and laugh at his sister running around making a puppy “fly”.
It’s almost five hours later and I’m still in pain.
Which is why Mariah and I are having pizza rolls for supper. I’m still cramping so DON’T JUDGE ME. It’s what she picked, dammit.
And it’s delicious.
So there.
I’m so mature.
Mariah · Parenting · Random Bits · Rants
Casey
said,
July 9, 2008 at 8:19 pm
oh cramps… not looking forward to those again
loz
said,
July 10, 2008 at 8:29 am
my mom told me my cramps would eventually subside once i grow up and get married. but i guess you are still experiencing it so there is truly no hope for me.
im sorry you had to go through that i seriously know how it feels, i’d have to skip school a lot because i physically could not move because of my cramps and i just feel HORRIBLE. lol
Caitlin
said,
July 10, 2008 at 9:33 am
Aww, that is adorable! Sometimes the little things kids say just mean so much. It’s always so genuine, too, because they haven’t learned to filter their naughty thoughts yet!!
shelbie
said,
July 10, 2008 at 1:00 pm
Aw, that’s so cute! (:
I know exactly what your feeling - I’m literally crippled with pain when it’s my time of the month. I can’t move and usually I have to lie on the sofa with my hot water bottle. =/
But least Mariah & Gabriel behaved for you
xxx
Kilanda
said,
July 11, 2008 at 11:08 am
Aw I’m sorry that you were/are having cramps. I don’t really have that anymore since I started my blood pressure pills. I hope that you are feeling better. Your daughter sounds so cute hehe. I’ve had some bad ones trust me and they suck so bad! So I feel your pain I think must girls do hehe.
Julie
said,
July 11, 2008 at 8:14 pm
Hey, nothing wrong with pizza rolls every now and then. I’m sorry you felt so awful. Hope that’s all done with.
Gwen
said,
July 12, 2008 at 6:38 am
As every woman knows, cramps are the worst! No one is judging you, hun. I say, kudos to you for even making it to the supermarket!
Hope you’re feeling better by now.
Simply Precious
said,
July 13, 2008 at 12:22 pm
LOL about the whole thing with Mariah! That’s cute! Hehe!
Wow, sorry to hear about the cramps!! =( I HATE cramps too! I’m glad to hear that you didn’t get sick at the grocery store though. If I had that bad of a cramp, I wouldn’t even go anywhere! Wow, I hope you’re feeling better now…
Meghan
said,
July 16, 2008 at 9:57 pm
Cramps suck, hope you feel better.
Pizza rolls on the other hand are lovely.